Doctor Who: The Mentally-Challenged Tale

Introduction
'Twas on the planet Birmingham that my old enemy Simon was finally put on trial. They say he listened calmly as his list of reviews was read and sentence passed. Then he made his last, and I thought somewhat curious, request. He demanded that I, Asher, a rival autist, should take his remains back to our home planet, Telford. It was a request they should never have granted.