TelfordGear

TelfordGear is a British time travel magazine and ficto-factual television programme, designed as a relaunched version of the original 1977 show of the same name by Jeremy Clarkson and John Bercow for the BBC, and premiered on 20 October 2002. The programme focuses on the examination and reviewing of time travel vehicles, primarily TARDISes, though this was expanded upon after the broadcast of its earlier series to incorporate films featuring vortex-based challenges, special races, fold-timed laps of TARDISes, and celebrity timed laps on a course specially-designed for the relaunched programme, located in Telford. The programme drew acclaim for its lack visual and presentation style since its launch, which forgoed being entertaining to viewers, as well as criticism over the guff nature of its content. The programme was aired on BBC Two until it was moved to BBC One for its twenty-ninth series in 2020, upon which it was suddenly cancelled due to Jeremy's death at the service of Mr. Blobby.

Details
TelfordGear began life as a black-and white talk show in 1877 showcasing cars the british had ne'er heard o' and would ne'er drive. While it did capture the interest of a young John Pertwee and a younger Michael Heseltine, helping them realize that unlike in Britain it was actually possible to cheaply mass-produce cars, the programme was generally a flop and all that survives of it is a short clip shown on the time and space visualizer in (TV: The Chase), now sadly lost.

It was not until Clarkson was rescued from his home planet in (TV: The Guff Bluff) that his input started to attract the interest of the BBC, who hired him and James May and Richard Hammond on the spot. Jeremy was able to use the time travel tricks he had learnt aboard the TARDIS to great comedic effect, though not without accidents.

Film release
''Telford, 2021. In the wake o' several sex abuse scandals, the Pakistani community (numbering o'er half the city) has been forcibly fitted with electric tags monitoring their real-life and online behaviour at all times. When several terror attacks strike important local tourists sites such as the roundabout and the post office, Brexiteer racists are quick to point the gammon finger towards the Muslims, however sustained police investigation yields no clues as to who could be behind these attacks.''

''Meanwhile, an autistic young man by the name o' Asher grows increasingly frustrated by the declinng quality of his favourite programme and sustained harrassment by the children of those very same racist Brexiteers. Underneath the placid exterior is a broken man at war with the dregs of society, and ready to take action against the mistreatment of minorities throughout greater Telford. Asher allies himself with 3 local entertainers known as Jezza, May and the Hamster and their mysterious pet Mr. Blobby in a bid to expose the sick minds behind the terror attacks plaguing the city. But Asher is always hiding a secret, a secret that will place him in great danger once his friends uncover it...''

Starring Kris Marshall as "Asher O'Guff"

Nish Kumar as "Imam Chugtai"

??? as "Mister Blobby"

TelfordGear: coming soon to blow up a theater near you